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Have you ever been asked in an interview “Where do you see yourself in five years from now?”
I have too often. A question I loathed, and don’t think my answers were impressive.
For some people it is easy to articulate a career path, outlining the qualifications to be gained, the specific roles desired to achieve that plan.
Maybe you are better at a five year financial plan, paying off the mortgage or saving for a new car, boat or holiday.
Are you a person who likes to set five year goals for relationships, or something else on a personal level.
I joined the Australian Army Reserve in my early 20’s. Always wanting to drive a tank when I was young, I jumped at the opportunity when it presented. The plan was to try out the lifestyle and skills before following family history and joining the regular defence forces. Well that plan was cut short by an accident during a training exercise.
I remember when I first started to study at Uni, I didn’t really have any concrete plans. Like most of my high school mates, we just went where we got in and got stuck into a mix of study and social life. Enjoying the freedoms Uni presented that High School didn’t. My original plan loosely included finishing the degree and then finding work in a finance related role, somewhere in a big city building in Melbourne’s CBD.
I got that job, in a big city building in Melbourne’s CBD, but only after one year at Uni. My plan only partly succeeded.
After recalibrating my goals, I finished my degree part time whilst working full time in a related discipline. I enjoyed working for that company for 8 years. During which I was able to navigate my way through different areas that built on my skills and experience. Most of the corporate employment I had since then continued to be built simply by adding to existing skills in areas of interest. I did have an idea of what I wanted my career to look like, but it wasn’t as locked in or articulated as those interviewers wanted to hear.
Five years ago my life’s plans were rolling along.
I was involved in some ministry activities with my church. I was working in a management role in a discipline whose skills I had been building over the years. I was undertaking post graduate studies specific to my role, and was looking forward to further opportunities within that firm.
Then everything changed with one phone call.
The first week of May marked five years since that phone call was placed that totally obliterated any and all plans, regardless of the timeframe they were for. Little did I know what was about to happen, not only to my career but to my personal and family life, and the ministry opportunities I was involved in at my church.
I had been feeling unwell for a few weeks. Having fainted on a lunch time walk the week before, I began to sense that something wasn’t right. I was working from home when I felt that dreaded punch in the arm. I knew this meant it was time to make the call I had been putting off. I called out to my wife to call me an ambulance.
Little did I know that that phone call was going to be the first of many calls to 000 over the next 18 months.
Little did I know that the first night I spent in hospital was going to be the first of about 80 nights over that 18 month period.
Over the next few days, I underwent multiple tests to ascertain what was causing these irregular life threatening heart arrhythmia’s. I was borderline having a complete heart block.
The emergency room doctors didn’t know how I was still alive!
On the second day in hospital, I got the news. The doctors and nurses came into my room and delivered the diagnosis. Phrases I had never heard before. Words I couldn’t pronounce.
How could this be so? I was a healthy eater, didn’t drink much alcohol. I regularly walked, ran and loved hiking. I had always been a strong swimmer. I had even played in brass bands since I was 8 years old. Playing the tuba required strength, great lung function and capacity.
For about the next hour after receiving the news I cried non-stop. Then I did something that I believe changed the course of my new future.
I made a prophetic declaration.
I decided the only course of action was to put my faith into action.
I opened my Bible to a blank page and wrote the name “JESUS” at the top of that page.
Philippians chapter 2, verse 9-11 says:
“Therefore God also has highly exalted Him and given Him the name which is above every name, that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, of those in heaven, and of those on earth, and of those under the earth, and that every tongue should confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father.”
All I knew to do with this news was this, to bring it to God. By writing the name of the diagnosis under the name of Jesus, I was putting it where I believed it belonged. Under the Name, the Authority, and the Power of Jesus name.
I was robbing it of its power to control and dictate my life.
I was making a statement that it was only a diagnosis, not what God says about who I am.
You won’t hear me speak out the name of this diagnosis outside of a medical appointment. This is because I also believe that the declared word holds power.
When I speak of my health, I always preface it by “I was diagnosed with a rare and incurable heart disease.”
For I also believe what the Bible says about me being created in the image of God and that “no weapon formed against me shall prosper” (Isaiah 54:17).
Understand me, I am not naive to my physical condition and the impact it has had on my life. I accept the natural but believe that what God says about me is the truth and has the final say. I believe that as the prophet Isaiah declared “by His (Jesus) stripes you are healed.” (Isaiah 53:5)
I was now no longer concerned with a five year plan. I was more concerned with the next five hours. My life and all my goals, plans and desires were placed on hold.
I was working on multiple projects at work.
I was half way through the final subject for my post graduate studies.
I was supposed to be going on an overseas mission trip later in the year.
The earthly pursuits of previous days were irrelevant. Everything I chose to do needed to have an eternal perspective. I have the assurance that one day I will live in heaven, but I’m not in a hurry to get there. I wanted to live longer, I wanted to be a grandfather one day!
My priority now was staying alive.
An amazing thing happened that night I made the prophetic declaration.
I awoke during the night to a loud sound, like an earthquake. I opened my eyes and saw two warrior angels descend into my room and stand at the foot of my bed. These warriors were over seven foot tall, and looked ready for battle. Feeling great peace at this encounter, I said hello to them and went back to sleep.
Later that morning when I woke, I still saw them in my room. Their presence was tangible. I believe that these two angels were on assignment direct from God to protect me. Psalms 91 verse 11 says that God gives His angels charge over us!
In the days that followed, every time that I left my room for tests, one of them came with me, the other staying in my room.
The day that I went into surgery to have the dual chamber pacemaker/defibrillator implanted, one of these angels stood with his back to the theatre room door and stood guard. No one or nothing was going to pass by him.
Since that phone call, I have not been well enough to return to work. I stopped counting how many ECG’s I have had once I passed 100. I have also lost count of the number and type of blood tests I have had. Countless x-rays and scans and numerous procedures/surgeries.
I had my drivers licence suspended indefinitely.
According to some medical professionals, I should have died no less than three time since first going into hospital.
Since implanted, my defibrillator has discharged 12 times. Most occasions I don’t know it is about to ‘provide therapy’ or as I say, ‘go off.’ If my heart rhythms are in ventricular fibrillation, the world seems to stand still for a few seconds. I get a physical warning that my defib is about to go off.
I don’t know what is worse, having it go off all of a sudden, or having those few seconds warning.
The worst day of my life occurred when my defib discharged 8 times in an 11 minute period. It felt like it was never going to stop. Sadly the cardiologists had a term for this type of an event. They call it a storm. Interestingly, I didn’t realise how serious my situation had become until after three ambulances attended my house, but where I was taken when arriving at the hospital emergency department. That section is where people who were experiencing a stroke, or serious car accident survivors were taken. I had a nurse dedicated to me, not shared amongst several cubicles.
This trauma wasn’t limited to my physical health. My mental health has suffered also.
My identity was shattered. I had to relearn who I was. I have had many counselling sessions to manage the PTSD these event have caused.
I have had much prayer from family and fiends. I have even had ‘the elders of the church’ pray with and anoint me.
My life seemed to be on a merry go round of medical appointments, medication changes and subsequent side effects.
I can understand why some marriages breakdown when a traumatic event occurs directly impacting that relationship. My wife has been by my side the whole journey. She has endured the hours of appointments and stays in hospital. She has had to run our household whilst caring for her husband.
Most challenging though, she has been directly impacted by the side effects of the medication.
The man she married has changed, physically and mentally. Our relationship has had moments of intense struggle. We have endured though because of the solid foundation of friendship our relationship was built upon.
It has been a challenging five years to say the least.
You can’t plan for these major traumatic events in life. You cannot predict how you will live with a life limiting diagnosed disease or illness.
I strongly believe that my prophetic declaration set the foundation for this season. At times I felt like I was loosing a battle, but I as not going to loose this war.
I was not going to be defeated.
My warrior angels have travelled with me since.
My health is stable at present. I am more active and have had my drivers licence reinstated.
Many people have said that my faith inspires them, and that I look much healthier these days.
So what next?
Is it time to develop a five year plan?
It is a fine balance between doing too much and regressing, and maintaining this stable health. I don’t know if I will be able to return to work in the capacity I was in five years ago.
I am however interested in achieving one of my life goals – to get a PhD in Theology.
This goal was looking very difficult to achieve when I was working, not to mention the past few years. How does this plan work, enrolling in the Masters of Theology course followed by the PhD level. My time is flexible enough these days to do some study. It is also a realistic timeframe to complete this in the next five years.
Not a bad plan, health permitting!
My challenge to you is this –
Does your five year plan include an eternal perspective or limited to earthly pursuits?
Are your plans flexible enough to withstand significant challenges?
Are you declaring words of hope over your life and those around you?
